* Babygirl has been sent back down to the AHL. I would be distraught, but I doubt he'll be there long.

* There is a team-building aspect to hockey, the inter-league weirdness and contracts that I am not looking into right now. There is a lot to the sport and I am trying to take a balanced approach... except when it comes to arena conversion videos. I will watch footage of areas switching back and forth between rink mode endlessly.

But, it is weird to me that Canada, who are so serious about player development, pretty much force NHL teams to roster Canadian draftees early or lose them to their juniors teams. And sometimes that means keeping then on the NHL roster and just scratching them every night, so no ice time. Top Canadian talent don't get a stepping stone between juniors and NHL the way other prospects do. We need to either not play them while they train and bulk up with no real play, or let them be penalty bait. We've gotten goals off of how hard other teams go after our youngest player, but that's not great.

Okay, a few vids and edits. Sound absolutely on with them all!

First, two funny edits by hoechloin (tumblr) with soundtracks and embellishments that make me laugh out loud - Shane freaking out and being his dorky self:

shane-hollander-freaking-out-for-1-minute

shane-hollander-freaking-out-for-90-seconds-part-2

Fanvids:

an angsty one to Casual by Chappell Roan by Leocities (play it with closed captions to get the most out of the great editing to the lyrics)

and a happier one to Long Time Running by The Tragically Hip by peakyboyos

What have I been up to lately? Mostly staying put and avoiding the cold, the snow and the ice. All the sanders are not helping much with the sidewalks. Maybe sand gets tracked up on the sidewalk at intersections, but unless you are near a school (lots of foot traffic there) that's not terribly helpful.

So I have been watching some tv recently. The two things I've been following are Fallout and Severance. I kinda find Fallout hard to watch.Every time a zombie shows up I find my eyes sliding away from the tv. Why do they all have the same look - even the children playing zombies look the same as the two hundred year old ones. Were they also zombiefied at the same time only they some were actual children? I gather the show is based on a video game but its not like I've encountered (m)any video games. I probably should start again and see if I pick up more details.

But honestly that's mostly curiousity and what I'm really invested in is Severance. It's giving me strong Lost vibes. That's how long it has been since I fell this deeply into caring about the world building and characters of a show. And don't tell me how Lost fell down at the end, I don't agree.) Lost made me happy and sad and it made me feel. Severance is hitting all three points beauifully. I'm so eager to see what happens next.Anyone else getting Lost vibes from Severence?

I finally heard a piece of music, I've heard of way back, way, way back. I think it dates back to my childhood so maybe I overheard a friend's older sister talking about it. But yesterday was the first time I ever heard Gadda da Vida. Loved it, the wait was worth it. Here is a link to the full version, just in case:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UIVe-rZBcm4&list=RDUIVe-rZBcm4&start_radio=1




ETA: I realize they are ghouls not zombies. Possibly stringing thoughts together at that time is not a good idea. :)

The next Firewhiskey Fic event for the altered-states creation of fanworks along with lots of sociability amongst fellow participants will take place from Friday, February 13th to Sunday, February 15th. If you'd like to spend some time creating fanworks while either imbibing or doing the 420 in an environment of online partying with the FWF fen, join the comm at Firewhiskey Fic on Dreamwidth. No signups, no stress, no sobriety.

More info will be posted the week before the event.

Gratitude / Self-reassurance / fighting against negativity bias!

1. The animals seem happy and content. I don't go to the barn every day and sometimes I feel bad about that, but I suspect I'm stressing over nothing, or channeling other stress into this area. The cat and dog make me laugh and are good companions. Again I stress sometimes with Sally the dog, but, it's probably easier to be crabby with her than with my family.

2. The house is reasonably clean, it's warm inside, the hot water is working, etc.

3. I have some friendly and wonderful neighbors.

4. My parents are doing well. My mom is so much better now that she's in the assisted living place rather than the nursing home. Just a huge relief.

5. I got to chat with two good friends today, Jesse and Emily, and it was a real mood lifter.

6. TV I'm enjoying: The Pitt, FallOut, Heated Rivalry.

7. On YouTube I watch the Handsome Podcast almost every single day. This is 3 queer comedians (Tig Notaro, Fortune Feimster, and Mae Martin) chatting and being silly.

8. I've been playing Terra Nil on my laptop and I can't rec it highly enough. I feel like it is meditative in the best way and really helps my brain chill out. The game play is very similar to Sim City, but instead of building a city you get to reclaim wasteland and turn it into wilderness. Very easy to learn, but challenging enough to keep me engaged. Click-only means it's easy to play in bed with my beloved Left-handed mouse, and doesn't bother my right shoulder. Sound design is relaxing, the graphics are pretty. Minimal reading makes it migraine compatible for me, and i can control the motion. It's not timed. Thank you to my friend eruthros for buying this game for me.

Please feel free to link me to all your Yuletide recommendations!

I gave up on most of my fanfiction reading logging the last couple of months, but hope to start that up again soon. In the meantime, I post TBR Challenge and monthly reading logs on my website/blog - I haven't been cross-posting here recently, my apologies, but my reading has been pretty sparse anyway. My December reading log goes live there Friday morning.

An interesting essay on why Connor Storrie is much more likely to get an award than Hudson Williams (if either of them does). Clarifies a number of things I'd been vaguely thinking about.

And a hockey player from the USA leagues has just come out publicly and in detail, saying his statement was partly inspired by Heated Rivalry. It's not quite that dramatic - he was partly out already (to friends and family and had been playing in LGBTQ+ clubs since 2017) but it looks like this is his first major statement on social media. He never made the NHL but used to play in the USA leagues - the intricacies of all the NHL/AHL league levels baffle me. Anyway, it seems important, and was undoubtedly made a bit easier for him by the reception of Heated Rivalry.

I am trying to make a poster for my strongest held opinion on hockey: they goalies should serve their own penalties. Why? Because it's cute.

( Sadly, it's turning out very Graphic Design Is My Passion )

A bit late on my roundup, better late than never!


Here's the stats:

• Read 51 books
• Watched 88 movies
• Completed 9 TV shows
• Completed 1 podcast
• Wrote 93,034 words across 101 hours and 39 minutes-- That's an average of 15 wpm!
• Completed 43 hours and 40 minutes of crochet. 
• Completed 13 hours and 45 minutes of Tunisian crochet
• Completed 27 hours and 51 minutes of tatting.
• Baked (at least) 38 items (that I counted)

Breakdown of my goals:

1. Write the 50 chapter keith/lance/hunk vld college au
Yeah... that was too lofty a goal LMFAO. I did get 23 of the chapters done! 80,084 words long so far, across 78 hours (~86% words, ~70% time) of my writing. 

2. Crochet a new temperature blanket for my first full year in this new state
Obviously there was no way that this one was going to get fully done, since I'd still have to join stuff together after finishing the last day. But I did fall a couple months behind on this along the way, so I've got some finishing to do in 2026.

3. Draft 4 poems
I'm not sure I fully got 4 to a 'drafted' state, since I meant to imply a full first draft. I completed two that I shared with my IRL writing group. I have two more that are missing a couple pieces before I'd consider them 'drafted', that I worked on at the tail end of the year. Still a lot of progress!

4. Outline a specific original story I've had in the back of my mind 
I made decent progress on this, considering everything! There's still a lot of bits in the middle that need to be filled in before I can start writing it, but I'm happy to take my time with this to get it right.

5. Make at least 3 projects I'm proud of, outside of the things mentioned earlier in this list ✅
I think I definitely achieved this, between my quote/art canvases, the slippers I Tunisian Crocheted for a friend, and a tatted split ring bookmark!

6. Finish / catch up on a podcast (probably welcome to nightvale, but it might be this tumblr podcast I lost track of a while ago) ✅
I listened to all of Once Upon a Time at Bennington College, which was a fascinating look into Donna Tartt, an author I've come to appreciate in recent years.

7. Get as many geochaches as I can ✅
Apparently this number is 2.5! As in, I officially found 2 and I know where a third one is, but last time I went and was able to reach it I didn't have a pen for a log. 

Some Reflection on 2025

Last year was rough for me. My ongoing health issues continued to see little improvement, as I struggled to jump through the hoops to get a doctor to take me seriously, know what I was talking about, and agree to treat me. 

In therapy, I've been struggling a lot with the feelings of disappointment, shame, and grief that have come along with having fatigue-causing chronic health issues continually get in the way of my goals-- or even anything that I wanted to do for myself. It's been work and exercise and chores and a looooooot of sadness. Part of the reason it's taken me so long to getting around to doing this wrap-up was the fear of seeing just how little I completed of my goals-- even though, realistically, I did a lot.

I've got some ideas for how to alleviate this pressure while still having aspirations I can work towards in 2026, but that's for another post. It's going to take me a bit more time to get it set up. I'll be back when it's ready to talk about. 

If you're here reading this, thanks for following along with my journey over the past year. I know I'm not super active on here-- you can see why-- but I'll be back for more monthly check-ins in the year ahead. I can hope for that much, at least. 
 

New Album coming? Free DL of old album? Collab T-shirt with Homestarr Runner???

Welcome to my journal!

My journal is primarily a personal one, posting about the various things that interest me, as well as the things that happen in daily life.

I live in Colorado with my partner, Alex (whom I met on Livejournal, originally!)

I try to frequently share pictures when I've gone on hikes or other fun places. The doing things tag is probably the most comprehensive tag for these posts, but hiking will narrow it down to just hikes, and pictures will broaden it to anything that felt pic-worthy, even if it was just a quick walk in the neighborhood, or a garden, or a pet being cute.

My pets are another frequent topic of posts and pictures. Currently I have four: Belladonna, an almost-four year old pit bull; Summer "Berry Mad" Refresher, a young Woodhouse's toad, and Guava Splash Electrolyte, a young chorus frog; and currently (as of January 2026) have Clickbait, a broad-winged katydid, who has more than doubled his life-expectancy! Cyanide, our elderly pit bull, sadly passed away in June of last year. He is still sorely missed. Guest-star pets include Jaspurr (a cat) and Ripley (a garter snake), who belong to my mom and younger sibling.

I also post about writing fairly often, which is mostly lumped under the writing tag. I have a post here collecting summaries and links to all the fics I have shared. While I haven't completed any new works in a couple years, I am still slowly working on things.

I am pretty firmly in the "hobby" writing camp; it isn't something I do professionally, nor am I likely to try to. Sometimes there's that vague temptation, but then I remember how awful the rest of publishing sounds, haha. Most of what I've written is fanfiction, but am trying to start devoting more time and energy to my original works as well. I'm not certain how or if I will share the original works, but I'd like to actually at least get them written.

Fandom-wise, I've nearly exclusively written Kingdom Hearts AUs focused on the "Destiny Trio"/SoRiKai OT3. (I haven't played a Kingdom Hearts game in more than a decade, and don't have the systems required for any of the newer ones, but I imprinted on the characters and just never stopped liking them!) I also wrote one Silent Hill fic that I'm quite proud of. Those two fandoms are a bit of a 180 from each other, I realize, haha.

Other fandoms that I'm more of a lurker in include: Zero Escape (999/Virtue's Last Reward/Zero Time Dilemma), Captive Prince, Newsflesh, other Seanan McGuire/Mira Grant series, Murderbot, Final Fantasy XIV, and I'm sure plenty of others I'm just failing to remember at the moment. Nothing has really grabbed onto me in a way that just won't let go in many years, though I still hope that someday something else will.

The last couple of years I've been trying to do more reading, and so that is also something I often post about. My preferred genres are fantasy, science fiction, horror, and romance, especially when any of the above are queer. I do try to post reviews of the books I read. You can also see my reading on LibraryThing.

I also watch a lot of horror movies. (Good horror is great, and bad horror is hilarious, so it tends to be win/win to pick some mediocre streaming offerings.) I used to have a blog reviewing horror movies, but despite a decade+ of intentions, I never got back around to continuing that.

I do still miss the heyday of Livejournal as a primary form of social media, and I know that Dreamwidth probably won't ever have that kind of critical mass... but I love that Dreamwidth is here, and I love that there are still people to connect with on a "slower" and more personal, long-form site.

Feel free to add me or comment below if you want to say hi! I'm always happy to find new friends.

Thank you kindly to the fen who sent me holiday cards in December and early January: noxelementalist, james, dine, adafrog, aurumcalendula, spikesgirl58, elayna, lauramcewan, sidleypkhermit, and brumeier.

If you sent me a card and you aren't listed here, that's a postal fail. If you are listed here and didn't get a card from me, that's another postal fail.

Someone is having a very normal reaction to our new library having gender neutral bathrooms. I did not run into the van's driver, but I heard reports and those reports where to put as much distance between you and him as possible. Basically, if you see this guy, be elsewhere.

* And another hour long interview that seems very worth my time just dropped. I still haven't finished the What Chaos interview with Robbie. Just need to take all the HR content a sip at a time. Well, not all the content. I don't need to see all ten thousand promo vids, but all the content that I want to get to is going to last me a whiiiiille.

* For most of the season the Kraken had a lot of top players in the Injured Reserve list. We aaaaalmost have everyone back except Murray. Which means we might be able to do something wacky called 'play a game with the roster we intended for this season'.

But the downside is returning players means we need at least one person off the roster, and only a few can do so without waivers. ( Hockey talk )

So, I've written some drabbles. They are original fiction, for an urban fantasy setting. (And yes, I'm still writing more of them.)

I'd love it if you friendly people could have a read…

( five drabbles )

If you want to see Emor at its best, visit its City Court in session.

Actually, if you are staying with an Emorian acquaintance, it's unlikely you'll be given any choice about this. Emorians assume that everyone in the world is as enthralled with their laws as they are. Thankfully, Emorians are right to be proud of their law system, founded centuries ago by their Chara and council. This law system, known simply as the Chara's law, is one of the bulwarks of civilization in the Three Lands.

The best way to visit a law court is to prepare yourself beforehand by listening to an Emorian explain their law system to you. Any Emorian will do; even Emorian ditch-diggers know a good deal about the law. Indeed, even Emorian women do.

The City Court is not terribly formal, by Emorian standards, and the rules for behavior will be explained to you beforehand by the guards at its door. Wear your best clothes and be on your best behavior; otherwise, you can relax and enjoy the spectacle.

On your way out, be sure to visit the adjoining Law Academy, founded by the City Court in order to give advanced lessons in the law. The Academy does not try to compete with the traditional Emorian methods of learning law: tutoring, apprenticeships, and playing law-based games when one is a boy. Rather, the Academy provides supplemental education for Emorians who plan to apply for high positions in the law, such as at the palace. Most of the Academy students are between the ages of eight and sixteen, though students as young as four are accepted, if they plan to apply for a youth post, such as scribing or paging. On the other end of the scale, a few students are full-grown men who, because of unfortunate circumstances, missed out on the normal training in the law that virtually all Emorian boys receive. In recent years, many of these students have been former slaves. The Academy welcomes them all, even going so far as to pay the fees of any students whose slave service left them penniless.

[Translator's note: Emorians' obsession with the law is on full display in Law Links.]

In what wound up feeling very fitting for the week, Cthulu rising up to devour the world; by my friends the Atomic Pixies.

This was not a great week. The murder of Renee Good was horrifying, and more horrifying was a lot of the reaction to it. (And yes, I'm aware she is far from the first person murdered by ICE.) The anger and frustration and sense of despair overshadowed and felt far more important than anything else happening for the week. Work was mediocre. Writing was nonexistent. Reading was okay, but short of what I wanted.

Goals for the week:

• I did patch the seat of the truck
• I finished reading Manhunt
• I read Through Gates of Garnet and Gold
• I started reading Ninth House
• I did not post my January (or broader 2026) writing goals
• I sorted out my what-needs-doing for plant care, but didn't start on doing it
• I did not work on my WIP outline
• We paid rent
• I did post my reading goals for the year

Tracked habits:

• Work - 5/7
• Household Maintenance - 4/7
• Physical Activity - 1/7
• Wrote 500/1000+ Words - 0/7
• Non-fiction Writing - 1/7 - over 1000 words
• Meta Work - 6/7
• Personal Writing - 6/7
• Other Creative Things - 0/7
• Reading - 7/7 - I finished Manhunt, read Through Gates of Garnet and Gold, started Ninth House; I started my ebook side-read, Our Bloody Pearl; Alex and I read some of The Sun Dog
• Attention to Media - 7/7 - Sunday we watched the Ravens game, which was pretty crushing, then news and then reviews; Monday we finished Stranger Things which was... fine, then reviews; Tuesday we watched news coverage; Wednesday we watched some news, then some storm chasing, then some reviews; Thursday watched news coverage and then reviews; Friday watched news; Saturday watched paranormal stuff, then news, then later reviews.
• Video Games - 0/7
• Social Interaction - 6/7

Total words written: 2245 of non-fiction, setting reading goals

Thanks to silversea who shared this over at booknook!

Against my better judgement, I bought ANOTHER humble bundle...

This one is "Fierce Women of Science Fiction, Fantasy, and Horror," which offers 65 works by female authors writing in genre spaces. It's a pretty widespread timeframe, too: the oldest stuff is I think from the early 60s, spanning up through I think 2020 for the most recent?
(It's also *more* than 65; it's 65 files, but a few of those are sets of 2-5 books.)

I already had the Mira Grant works that were included (a fave author!), though the included titles seem a little weird... Book two of the Parasitology trilogy, the sequel-ish novel to the Newsflesh trilogy, and the novellas set in the Newsflesh world... but including the novellas both individually AND including the book that collected them? I want everyone to read more Mira Grant, but I'm not sure this is a great intro to her work. Though the novella collection, Rise, is worth the price of admission on its own, imo, I don't know if they have the same impact if you haven't read the trilogy already.

But there was something off my wishlist (Wylding Hall, which came up on a couple rec lists that I saw recently), plus a few other books that fall into the "hey, I recognize that! Never got around to reading it!" category, plus a few sci-fi and fantasy classics from the 60s-90s that I might not be likely to pick up at random, but might be good to read! (Especially as I continue trying to read some "classics" of these genres, rather than just recent releases.)
Since I was likely to spend at least $10 or so for the wishlisted book alone, it felt like too good a deal to pass up to get 60-some works for around $20, ha.

But my poor TBR. It's up to 580 books total now, and I KNOW I'm never going to get around to reading the whole thing. :(

This week we are learning about recycling.

---

To be clear, she does recycle. We've got that covered. We are doing Advanced Recycling, like "when they say 'no plastic bags' on the recycling dumpster they do in fact mean all plastic bags and not just the bin liner" and "not to put too fine a point on it but I think your habit of leaving unrinsed apple cider jugs on the floor next to the recycling bin is why we have ants in the kitchen."

I would've thought that last one was obvious but apparently not.

---

Meanwhile I am playing a long and unpleasant game called "can she get a ride home from a medical procedure with anesthesia." 

Multiple people have offered, mind you, it just turns out that oh no they're going to be out of town that day, or their car has broken down, or whatever.

You can get a medical escort service if you're low-income.

You can get a medical escort service if you're elderly.

If you're an adult of working age making an ostensibly living wage? Fuck you, you should have thought of that before you decided to have health issues while single.